Here’s one of the comments I hear most often from my gay male clients over the age of forty, “I’m just not turned-on anymore by guys my own age.”
Is this true for you? If so – especially if you are single – does this impact your dating and relationship success? Or if the guys your age who do turn you on ignore you because they’re not turned-on by guys their age, can this partially explain why you are a hot, lonely, older man?
Now what about men in relationships? If you are paired with a similar-aged partner, are you still turned-on by your mate? Is it an open sexual relationship where each of you – together or separately – hook up with young guys? Or is it a monogamous, long-term relationship now rarely sexual, but each of you jerk-off separately to porn. Does this impact being turned-on by your life partner? Can this help answer the question, “Why don’t we have sex with each other anymore?”
In this video I’m teaching that if we do not use our visual sense in a strategic way it can become a key factor exacerbating our depression with aging. As men, visually turned-on by other men, how can we truly be happy with our own aging male looks if we are only turned-on by younger guys?
What can we do about this dilemma? Plenty. This predicament is no longer hopeless or unchangeable. You don’t need to settle for just a piece of happiness, you deserve having it all.
I’ve designed strategies that respect the power of your visual sense. Regardless your current age as you learn intelligent methods on how to use your visual sense differently you will embrace getting older with increased joy and confidence. Some of my techniques guide you on how to utilize the fact that you’re visually stimulated for re-programming the brain to expand what turns you on. It’s shockingly easy to do, a great deal of fun and one of my numerous methods I’ll teach you in The Right Side of Forty to make changes that invest in your future happiness. Please check out the book section here on my blog to read an excerpt from my book’s introduction and here’s a direct link to order the book on amazon – The Right Side of Forty.
Thanks for this. It’s always a little depressing to hear a middle age gay man go on about someone half his age even when you know they know it won’t last because they are after all half their age. On the other hand, it seems as though more middle aged gay men used to make the effort to stay in shape, but have given up taking care of themselves.
Newly single and in my late 40s and wonder if/how Ill find someone who is in shape and of my age (I’ve always been into guys in their mid 30s – mid/late 40s… now they’re my peers!)
thanks very much for the feedback. Will, stay turned on to guys your age, that’s an important part of your happiness with your aging. When my book comes out next year and men start to realize the importance of guys staying turned on to men of a similar-age you are going to get a different response from the hot guys your age who are currently ignoring you. It’s also going to provide incentive for men to invest more in their own self-care.
I am 61 years old, my partner is 62. We have been together, monogamously for 9 years. I still jump him in the kitchen and we have THE best sex life I’ve ever had in my life. Why? we have a lot in common, respect each other and I think he’s hot. I think we are in the minority since most of our friends are either cynically single or bored with their long term partners. My only advice is don’t look for perfection, find what’s perfect in the guy you fell in love with. And one other thing, buy a sling, get some toys, dress up.. you have nothing to lose.
Nate you have a fantastic strategy to stay invested in fun not just right now, but most importantly in your future. Keep up the good work and I think you will find my book very exciting for expanding what you are already doing. Thanks very much for the feedback and describing how you have fun with your long-term partner. This is how we help men learn, by hearing other guys stories.