Comments for Bob Bergeron, LCSW

Comment on Resolution Success by eric brecht

eric brecht — Thu, 15 Dec 2011 17:29:46 +0000

I wish all the best in your live!

Comment on Start The Teaching by bobbergeron

bobbergeron — Sat, 29 Oct 2011 16:49:44 +0000

yes, Richard you are correct. Who’s going to help teach heterosexuals how to treat us if we don’t do it? Thanks for the feedback.

Comment on What Turns You On? by bobbergeron

bobbergeron — Sat, 29 Oct 2011 16:48:38 +0000

Nate you have a fantastic strategy to stay invested in fun not just right now, but most importantly in your future. Keep up the good work and I think you will find my book very exciting for expanding what you are already doing. Thanks very much for the feedback and describing how you have fun with your long-term partner. This is how we help men learn, by hearing other guys stories.

Comment on Start The Teaching by Richard

Richard — Sat, 29 Oct 2011 16:44:13 +0000

If we don’t do it, who will?

Comment on What Turns You On? by Nate Klarfeld

Nate Klarfeld — Sat, 29 Oct 2011 02:00:19 +0000

I am 61 years old, my partner is 62. We have been together, monogamously for 9 years. I still jump him in the kitchen and we have THE best sex life I’ve ever had in my life. Why? we have a lot in common, respect each other and I think he’s hot. I think we are in the minority since most of our friends are either cynically single or bored with their long term partners. My only advice is don’t look for perfection, find what’s perfect in the guy you fell in love with. And one other thing, buy a sling, get some toys, dress up.. you have nothing to lose.

Comment on What Turns You On? by bobbergeron

bobbergeron — Thu, 27 Oct 2011 15:04:02 +0000

thanks very much for the feedback. Will, stay turned on to guys your age, that’s an important part of your happiness with your aging. When my book comes out next year and men start to realize the importance of guys staying turned on to men of a similar-age you are going to get a different response from the hot guys your age who are currently ignoring you. It’s also going to provide incentive for men to invest more in their own self-care.

Comment on What Turns You On? by Will Clark

Will Clark — Thu, 27 Oct 2011 13:37:30 +0000

Thanks for this. It’s always a little depressing to hear a middle age gay man go on about someone half his age even when you know they know it won’t last because they are after all half their age. On the other hand, it seems as though more middle aged gay men used to make the effort to stay in shape, but have given up taking care of themselves.
Newly single and in my late 40s and wonder if/how Ill find someone who is in shape and of my age (I’ve always been into guys in their mid 30s – mid/late 40s… now they’re my peers!)

Comment on How Do You Cruise? by bobbergeron

bobbergeron — Tue, 20 Sep 2011 00:35:11 +0000

Thanks for your comment, I think it’s important to keep links with our gay heritage for embracing our gay identity, so the term cruising will likely not disappear, but if you’d like another option, how about the clinical term I use to describe it, like I mention in the first paragraph – sexual attention.

Comment on How Do You Cruise? by Mark

Mark — Mon, 19 Sep 2011 23:17:48 +0000

I am wondering if there is an alternative term that could be used instead of to cruise and “cruising”. That term seems a bit dated and hearkens back to a time when homosexuality was illegal and considered an illness–and the only option for gay men to meet was furtive sexual encounters in public places that often put gay men in physical and legal jeopardy. For me to cruise is being on the prowl for anonymous sexual encounters.

While I understand and appreciate the intent here, I feel like we as gay men need to change some of the language that often gives less legitimacy to how we socialize as gay men. Using that term today seems kind of heterosexist and homophobic, since the implication is that straight people flirt—which implies something innocent and “legitimate”-something that people do to show interest and that may to an actual relationship—while gay men “cruise” each other—which has a darker, much more predatory connotation.

I know I am splitting semantic hairs here but I think that the language we use is gay men has importance if we are to move towards legitimizing our relationships in a largely heterosexist world.

Comment on Probing Your Pride by bobbergeron

bobbergeron — Sat, 11 Jun 2011 16:37:27 +0000

you are very good at making eye contact and making other men feel welcome, keep up the excellent work!